With winter knocking at the door, trouble is the only thing warming up to come into our homes. Seniors and their caregivers face more winter weather challenges than most people.
If you have never had the experience of being in the shoes of an older person, imagine the time you had a very nasty ( featuring fluids streaming out of your body ) flu bug. Then remember the lack of ability to plan and accomplish your normal activities. That feeling of inability to cope with problems is what can happen to a senior, acutely ill or physically challenged person.
When it feels like life is coming at you like a train out of control, planning goes out the door along with good judgment.
Pride on the other hand .... you know what I mean..... old fashioned, overwhelming stubborn pride........ sticks to us like a leech on the back of our necks sucking out the ability to ask for help, especially when we need help the most .
The combination of financial demands, inability to work through problems and difficulty in asking for help can make winter a serious challenge. Caregivers who understand these facts can make the difference in quality of life and possibly even life and death.
Consider both the physical and financial aspects of dealing with winter. The basic needs include food, water, heat, clothing, sanitation, communication and medical needs. When time, energy or money run out, even the most important need can be ignored.
Help The Person Get Ready for Winter
There are basic chores than need done for winter. Help put away summer items. Get out stored winter clothes. coats, boots, gloves and other cold weather essentials. Tasks that may seem simple, can be daunting to someone aging or in ill health.
Get emergency supplies in place. Taking away the fear of being trapped without the essentials can be tough on a person. Pick a closet to cabinet and gather emergency supplies. Stocking a place with LED flashlights, a backup battery radio, bottled water, food that can be eaten out of the package when utilities are off are the types of things that take the fear out of winter storm entrapment.
If they do not have a cell phone, consider a TracPhone or other emergency phone. It doesn't need to be an expensive phone, but supply a simple phone available if the regular phone system goes down or the person needs to leave a home.
The isolation of winter is one of cold weather's biggest and meanest challenges. Set a time to talk. Anticipating a call can be as exciting as a phone call itself during dreary weather. There are many ways to make these talks interesting and meaningful. Asking about a story or experience from the past can be a great thing for everyone. You may even want to take notes about "the way things were" for a family history.
Talk money. This is a tough one. People do not like to talk about the subject of if there is not enough money for utilities, medicine and food. They may be embarrassed, or too confused to apply for programs that can help with expenses like LIHEAP for heating assistance. A few hours of effort sorting out these issues could take a lot of stress from a person you care about.
Find out about essential medicines and put in place a plan that makes sure there is always a sufficient supply of these on hand. Whether the difficulty is delivery or payment, there are programs and options that are available. Making those arrangements could take some time, but will be worth the effort.
Send a "thinking of you” basket when a storm or other event is coming. That provides a supply of food, but more importantly lets people know that you care. It can relieve the stress of not rushing to the store before the storm.
Do not forget the pet. This is one of the most important things in many homes. Food, water and a place to go if evacuating the home is very important.
Multigenerational housing arrangements start with the best of intentions. However, there can be stress and problems that arise. These should be discussed and sorted out ahead of time. The child returning from college will be on "college time". That loud music at 1:00 AM may not be welcome in the parent's home. The senior moving into their child's home will naturally desire to assume the role of head of household, when their health and other factors make that unreasonable. Communication ahead of time can enrich the experience and reduce stress for everyone involved.
Beware of potential financial landmines with shared financing of improvements in a multigenerational home. It often makes good sense for sharing the cost of renovations or additions to accommodate multigenerational living arrangements. Mom sells her home and moves in with daughter, it makes sense for mom to contribute to setting up her living space.
In certain circumstances when a senior contributes funds to the improvements in the relative's home, liens can be levied against the home if the senior later uses some of the social services assistance programs. Other examples include ownership issues that can arise from divorce and estate circumstances. The bottom line is to first consult an attorney when funding is shared between different parties.For more information go to www.SeniorHomeSafetyNetwork.com
Multi-Generational Housing Tips, Click to Download.pdf According to the Pew Research Center, a record 57 million Americans or 18.1% of the population of the United States were living in multi-generational households in 2012. This is double the number who lived in such households in 1980.
"Boomerang kids" and seniors "aging in place" living in homes with "the sandwich generation" make up the largest portion of these households. There are both very unique advantages and complex challenges with these arrangements.
The boomerang kids are often adult children returning home after college, loss of a job, a failed marriage or other problem living arrangement. They often bring their children into the home. Becoming a part of a grandchild's life is an abundant joy and bonus in what be a rough time of life.
For some seniors, living with an adult child may be the only choice that they can afford. For others, the freedom of living in a private home is a "quality of life" decision for the parent. Even the very best assisted living facility is restrictive and personally invasive. The company of children and grandchildren can be a great bonus for a senior as well as the younger family members.
Good planning should come first before converting to a multigenerational home
There will almost always be a need for renovation of the multigenerational home. A very important consideration is to preserve the resale value of the home. When creating separate quarters within a home, select materials and finishes that enhance the value of a home. The separate area can be finished with future use as a game room or home office area in mind.
An example would be when adding a separate cooking area, select appliances, cabinets and other materials that would look like they could be used as an entertainment kitchenette.
Privacy is a very important factor to consider. By the way, privacy goes both ways with each generation. Pocket doors used to be the "go to" design consideration to allow privacy while maintaining openness when desired . HGTV has come up with an attractive and easier to install solution. They use decorative doors on barn door type hardware to slide across the door openings.
A separate exterior entrance is an important feature. Having a push button combination lock on the door to the area is a great idea. This can allow family or professional emergency help to enter the space without damaging the door if a senior is unresponsive. It can also provide access when one of the generations is left without a key to the house.